Do Your Homework

A couple of weeks ago, I got an e-mail from someone who said he needed help in putting a proposal together for an international grant in a specific subject area.  He described the project, gave some background information, and asked if I would send him my resume.  It all sounded pretty reasonable, so I sent the resume and he sent back another e-mail asking for my phone number so that we could discuss his proposal needs.  He called yesterday.

On the phone, he indicated that the grant would would allow him and a university with which he is affiliated to continue their research in a particular country, and that the government of the country was very excited and supportive of the project.  Again, it sounded good.  At least until we got to this part of the conversation:

Me:  So what agency/organization are you submitting this grant to?

Him:  What do you mean?

Me:  I mean, what organization is interested in funding this project?

Him:  Well, I thought you could tell me that.

Me:  No, not really. 

Him:  What I want to do is to have one proposal written and then send it out to some funding organizations that you recommend.

Me:  That really isn't a good approach.  You have to identify organizations that might be interested in your project, you have to contact them and talk to them about it, and your proposal has to be written and organized in accordance with their specific requirements.  

Him:   So I can't just send the same proposal to each organization?

Me:  No.

Him  (shifting gears):  Well, then maybe you could tell me where I could get a loan for the project.

Me:  I don't know, you could maybe look at EximBank.

Me (becoming suspicious):  Why do you need some help with this grant proposal?  The University does a lot of grants, they know how to put a grant proposal together, they know about funding sources.

Him:  Well, they are busy people -- they teach, they do research, etc., so they may not have the time to help.

Me (finally realizes she is talking to a flake):  Well, I think you really need to get more information before you proceed further.

Him:  OK, I will talk to my colleague at the University.